Someone once told me “It’s okay to grieve for the things that once were.”
Daily there are new struggles, or new deaths of things you can’t do anymore. Carrying around a sense of mourning with you, wherever you go, is a strange feeling. It’s hard when you’re young to accept this is how life is and this is how it’s always going to be. It’s hard when you finally realise that your dreams and goals are just not plausible and having to reinvent yourself is a daunting experience.
There are things that I could do last year, last month, last week, that I can’t do now. I’m sure it’s near impossible to not be depressed from time to time about how FA affects you. I get down all the time. It’s such a cliche, but really, all you can do is focus on the things you can do rather than the things you can’t.
I think we as humans focus on being happy too much. I find being happy makes me feel as alive as being sad does. Being scared does as much as feeling brave. Emotions are there to be felt and I think we shrug them off like nothing happened. Why? Because, we, as humans, are too proud to show that things get to us. It is easier to pretend it’s not there than to accept things for the way they are. It is easier to show a stone cold heart than a face that has no clue where to turn. To me, it makes sense to smile when you’re happy, cry when you’re sad. Throw things when you’re angry, be scared when you’re afraid. Stop trying so hard to find happiness and it just might find you instead.